Seeing the Good in Others and Ourselves
Photo by Matheus Bertelli
Fundamental 24: Assume Positive Intent is my favorite fundamental. It deeply resonates with me because it reflects something I am passionate about: the belief that people are inherently good and generally mean well. Assuming this in my interactions with others has profoundly impacted my relationships and the outcomes we achieve together.
I believe we are biologically wired and culturally conditioned to mistrust. It’s a defense mechanism, one that has a purpose—primarily to keep us out of harm’s way and alive. This was likely crucial for our ancestors, who lived in dangerous environments where threats from others were common. And I recognize there’s still value in this today—like being cautious of someone approaching in a dark alley late at night. However, this mindset often hinders us in modern, everyday interactions and business relationships, where communication, collaboration, and partnership are essential.
In these situations, defensiveness and assuming ill intent can create a self-fulfilling prophecy: the more guarded we are with others, the more guarded they become with us. The truth is, most people are good—just like we are—doing their best in life. Contrary to what society may have conditioned us to believe, most people are kind and respectful. Aren’t you? If you are, then it’s likely that others are too. Most people wake up each day intending to do good and to contribute to society. When we understand this and choose to assume positive intent, everything changes.
It's amazing how the world tends to mirror the way we perceive it. As Anaïs Nin famously said, “We see the world not as it is, but as we are.” When we assume positive intent, something almost magical happens—people and circumstances begin to appear differently. People tend to bring their best selves when they feel seen instead of judged. We become more open to hearing and appreciating valuable ideas, thoughts, and perspectives that we might have otherwise missed had we been assuming negative intent.
It took me many years to understand this, and I didn’t always assume positive intent. Perhaps due to past experiences and the meanings I attached to them, I often approached others with a guarded attitude—and, predictably, they responded the same way. This created a negative cycle that perpetuated itself. Today, I choose to view others in a positive light, and it has made all the difference. My relationships are better, my results are better, and my overall experience of life is simply better.
This doesn’t mean that nothing negative ever happens, or that I never need to be cautious—what’s changed is that my default is no longer guardedness, but rather hopefulness and optimism. I’ve also learned to extend this assumption of positive intent to myself, and that too has been transformative. In moments when things aren’t going as well as I’d like, I often remind myself: “Eduardo, you are doing the best you can, and your best is good enough.” Let me tell you, this feels a lot better than beating myself up, and it has proven to be far more productive.
Assuming positive intent has changed how I relate to others and to myself. It has allowed me to open up, be vulnerable, and build stronger connections—both personally and professionally. The world becomes a more welcoming and supportive place when we choose to see the good in it, and that choice can start with us.
Fundamental of the Week #24: ASSUME POSITIVE INTENT
Work from the assumption that people are good, fair, and honest. Set aside your own judgments or preconceived notions, and give people the benefit of the doubt. Look for the positive intent in their actions and communications.
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